Monday, April 14, 2014

My Advice on Advice


Some boilerplate advice I love. “Outdo each other with kindness every day” is some of the best marital advice I’ve heard; while “Don’t go to bed mad” doesn’t do it for me. Because sometimes I go to bed mad and I wake up to a beautiful new day with a clear head and I think, “What was I so upset about? So glad I didn’t bring that up last night.”

“Nap when the baby naps” is another one. What if I’m not tired? What if I want to use the opportunity when the baby is napping to spend some rare alone time doing something I want to do? The pressure I used to feel to nap when my kids were napping made what could have been the treasured, calm part of my day one of the more stressful.

People who give advice mean well; they want the best for you. The problem is what’s best for one person isn’t necessarily the same for another. In my coaching certification program we were instructed not to give advice for this very reason. What advice is stressing you out? Can you disregard it? Who's consistently given you good advice?
My opinion? Be discerning.

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