From Guilt to Empathy

My 200-word blog posts are back for 2020!

Many people, myself included, are experiencing rampant emotions surrounding the world’s COVID-19 crisis, quarantining, and the uncertainty of when things might get back to “normal.” One of the emotions some of us are struggling with is guilt. I feel guilty because I am not a health care worker, postal worker, or grocery store employee on the front lines. I have a job I enjoy that I can do from my lovely home. My family and friends are healthy and safe. I do feel guilt for these privileges. On Friday, I heard psychologist Sunitha Chandy suggest a shift in thinking that I find comforting. She suggested that guilt is associated with having done something wrong. Guilt turns us inward and, instead of appreciating what we have, it causes us to shut down. Instead, she suggested, consider shifting guilt to empathy. Replace your messages of guilt with empathic ones like, “I am hurting that other people are going through this. I yearn for others to be supported.” And then follow that up with the outward-focused, “What is in my capacity to do to care?” I’m so thankful to Sunitha for this perspective. I hope it might help those of you feeling as I do.