You're Thoughtful, Evolving and Caring

Here’s a coaching tool we can all use in our everyday life - acknowledging.

Acknowledging is a way of providing recognition to someone else – and don’t we all appreciate being recognized? Acknowledging is less about noticing what people are accomplishing (e.g. “You did really well on that science quiz,” or “You did a great job on that project”), and all about how they are accomplishing it; how they are "being" as they get all this wonderful stuff done. For example, two people may have helped you with something today, but one might have been joyful and energized while doing it, and the other might have been engaging and warm while doing it.

When we give someone an acknowledgment (which might sound like, "Nancy, you are bright, authentic and welcoming" or "Dean, you are funny and devoted"), s/he usually feels like you have taken the time to really get to know him or her. It’s a great way to recognize someone.

Your coaching exercise for this post is to try it out. Here are some tips:

• Start with the words, "You are...." This will ensure that you are focusing on who the person is, rather than on what s/he is doing.
• Say who the person is being and then stop. Let what you've said sink in. Don't dilute the power of your acknowledgment by continuing to talk and explain. Just "You are inspiring" and that's it.
• This isn't a natural way we talk to each other on a day-to-day basis, so you may want to prepare in advance. Think about someone you'd like to recognize and then think about who you know that person to be. Write down an adjective, or two, or three (more than that is too many to take in at one time).
• Avoid generic adjectives, like “great,” “terrific” or “awesome.” The more specific you can be about the person in front of you, the more impact your statement has and the more connected you become. 
• As the NIKE campaign used to say, "just do it." This might feel like an awkward type of statement to make. Try it once. See how it goes and, if you're inspired, try it again. I'd love to hear how it goes!
• If you want a baby step here, put an acknowledgment in writing instead of stating it aloud. I do this in thank you notes, on birthday cards, in e-mails to colleagues who I want to recognize, and occasionally (but not often enough) on sticky notes for my kids and husband. 

You, my readers, are thoughtful, evolving and caring (otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading about this sort of stuff!). Go out and display your caring through an acknowledgment.

Best,
~ Sophie

P.S. Did you notice some changes to the blog? Other than some new formatting, three new pages have been added (see the row directly beneath the name of the blog for the tabs):

• "About This Blog" tells you what this blog is all about,
• "Books & Websites" is a comprehensive list of all of those resources that I have featured in one of the posts to the blog (and maybe some I love that I haven't yet had a chance to highlight), and 
• "Index" is an annotated list of posts to this blog to make finding one again easier. 

Please share your feedback about the blog any time and hope you like the new features!