The World Will Go On

Please know that I'm not saying what I'm about to say to insult you. Rather I offer this message in order to release you; to allow you to step away from your work, your familial obligations, etc. with a sense of freedom. So here goes: You're not that essential. 

 

The world will go on in your absence - or if you don't respond to an email in the next 24 hours. And, as it goes on, the people around you will gain some valuable experience. If you step out of your family situation for a break, new relationships will develop or deepen. Your children will do things you usually do for them and assert their independence.  When you step away from work, even if you're the only person who can do whatever it is you do, someone else will get the opportunity to learn it. People will step up to the plate and their doing so will be a valuable opportunity for them. People are more adaptable than we give them credit for; and we return to them restored and better able to support them. Basically, we're just not as essential as we sometimes think we are.

So what can you do with the gift of knowing that you're not needed? Whatever it is, enjoy it!

All the best!

~ Sophie

A Teenager on Procrastination

This post is my 14-year old’s explanation of his new approach to procrastination (that he adapted from an article he read on the Internet):

“With everyday tasks, you’ll assign pleasure to some and pain to others.  Procrastination is generally caused by people attaching pain to certain things and then wanting to avoid pain. The trick is to try to attach pleasure to the things you don’t like to do. This can be a reward, or anything that makes you happy for that matter. An example of mine is doing my homework. Homework is normally something people attach pain to and I found a way to attach pleasure to it through being able to say, ‘I’m done with my work. I have free time now to do what I want.’ So now this painful task creates pleasure – free time for me.”

What do you assign pain to? What pleasure can you assign to that activity instead?  Does doing that help you get to it any faster?

Good luck,

~ Sophie

• “It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.” ~ Leonardo da Vinci

• “Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.” ~ Pablo Picasso

A Year of Productivity

Here are seven things I’ve learned from a blog called “A Year of Productivity.” Its author is spending a year devouring everything he can get his hands on about productivity and sharing what he’s learning (http://ayearofproductivity.com). Fascinating.

 

1.    Finding email through search is way faster than organizing your inbox into folders.
2.   Your office is a pretty crappy environment to get work done. 
3.    Because of smartphones, people are bored less often and missing out on opportunities to look for excitement and ideas.
4.    Getting up early doesn’t make you more productive; getting enough sleep does. To determine whether you should wake up early, ask yourself, can I get more done past 9pm or before 9am?
5.    Taking breaks prevents you from becoming fatigued and helps you slow down, step back, reflect, and come up with better ideas.
6.    Drinking 16oz of water after waking up hydrates you after 8 hours without drinking, gives you more energy, fires up your metabolism, helps you focus, and even helps you eat less.
7.    A lot of people aspire to be productive so they can become happier, but happiness has been shown to lead to productivity, not the other way around.

Here's to a productive week!
All the best,
~ Sophie

Stepping Up to the Plate

A former colleague told me that she’ll go to bat for an idea three times, and if, by that point, she can’t get her higher-ups to see things her way, she lets it go. At least, she explained, she knows she’s said her peace, and then she can focus on supporting whatever the bosses decided to do. While one doesn’t necessarily need a formula like hers to approach situations where ideas differ, I really like some things about it: I believe in pushing back – that pushing back (respectfully and firmly) shows you care. If you go along with ideas you don’t believe in, your conscience may bother you. I also don’t like to always be the naysayer or the obstacle. Sometimes I have to support positions that aren’t my own – in the workplace or with my loved ones. I like the idea of knowing when you’ve pushed enough and the decision is out of your hands. I particularly like that when my colleague reached that point, she moved forward without resentment or regret.

What do you think of this approach? How do you make your opinions known? And how do you remain positive when you’re executing someone else’s?

All the best,

~ Sophie

What Was I Waiting For?

“You may delay, but time will not.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

I put off writing this post. Why? Because it had been so long since I’d written one that I felt intimidated. Surely if I posted something it would need to be fantastic in order to justify breaking such a long silence. And while ideas for posts have crossed my mind in the past several months, nothing seemed stellar enough; too much time had passed – and continued to pass – as I thought about whether or not to do it. Maybe writing one post would obligate me to write more, and I wasn’t sure I was ready to post more regularly.

Maybe you see what I’m getting at – that we can find a lot of reasons to keep ourselves from doing things we want to do:  That we may set our expectations too high, that we might be overly worried about the future implications of what we want to do now, or that we’ve just delayed too long already.  

So, what are you putting off? And how valid are your reasons for doing so? I'd love to know what you decide you can do. 

All the best,

~ Sophie

The Power of "And"

I always admired how a former colleague, in response to suggestions or requests, would reply, “Yes, and…” rather than “Yes, but…” “Yes,” she’d say, “adding a new session is a great idea, and we’ll have to utilize some additional resources,” versus, “Yes, adding a new session is a great idea, but we don’t have the resources.” “Yes, but” focuses on obstacles (e.g. "Yes, but we tried that before"). “Yes, and” drives us to uncover possibilities, improves upon the original idea, and makes for collaborative conversation. Those, like my colleague, who say “Yes, and” earn a reputation of being people who listen and add value.

Then there’s the concept of the “genius of the ‘and’; the tyranny of the ‘or’” from business best-seller, Built to Last. The “tyranny of the ‘or’” we’re told, is an unnecessary limitation on the heights to which we can rise: Not lower cost or higher quality, but both; not higher performance or lower price, but both. “Or” focuses on trade-offs; “and” is the aspiration and insistence that one can have both.

What a powerful word - “And!” What happens when you use it instead of ‘or’ and ‘but?’

Have a lovely day and be well!
~ Sophie

Decision-Free

Working at Weight Watchers, I’ve learned that people face about 200 food-related decisions every day (and remember only about 15 of them). This got me thinking – What if I made all my food-related decisions in advance? Wouldn’t that eliminate the need for willpower in the face of a box of donuts in the break room, or the chance of making a wrong choice when making a decision in a rush? For the last two days, I’ve tested this – planning each evening what I would eat the next day and when. I’m enjoying just checking off what’s on my list and ignoring all other choices and temptations. I wonder if there are other decisions that can be made in advance that would make making positive choices easier. Think so?

 All the best,

~ Sophie 

“Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Using the power of decision gives you the capacity to get past any excuse to change any and every part of your life in an instant.” ~ Tony Robbins 

 “All my life, whenever it comes time to make a decision, I make it and forget about it.” ~ Harry S Truman