The Power of "Yet"

Occasionally, I devote a post to making simple changes in our choice of words. Today’s word is “yet.”

Adding “yet” to a sentence adds hope – moving from “I can’t use that software” to “I can’t use that software yet.” Leaving opening the possibility of mastering it.

Using “yet” aligns with having a growth mindset, a mindset based on neuroscience and on research about the elasticity of the brain, which says that you can get better at anything you put energy into or get the right instruction on.

“Yet” is an optimistic word and optimism is important because, as a Mayo Clinic 30-year study found, “Optimistic people live about 19% longer than pessimists.” Pessimism promotes depression and helplessness. While it’s difficult to just decide to think or feel optimistically, Dr J. Mitchell Perry, author of The Road to Optimism… suggests that we change how we say things first and that a change in mindset can follow.  

In these challenging times, we can all use some hope and optimism. After all, we don’t have a vaccine for COVID yet and we aren’t yet sure when social distancing will end. Maybe adding this one little word into our vocabularies can help until then. 

Showing Compassion

Here’s an excerpt from a longer post I just added to LinkedIn on showing compassion:

Compassion is both an emotional response to suffering, and a call to action to reduce that suffering. In these times especially, showing compassion is enormously important.

The literature on compassion consistently points to these strategies:

• Avoiding judgment – When our default is to place blame, to be competitive, or to react automatically, it is hard to show compassion for others. To avoid judging, change the questions you ask yourself from “What’s wrong with them?” to “What are they thinking, feeling and wanting?” “What can we learn from this situation?” or “What’s the best thing to do now?”
• Recognizing common bonds – Now, more than ever, we need to focus on what we have in common with others – not what divides us. Start with the fact that we’re all trying to do our best, that we all want to be happy, and that we’ve all experienced loss.
• Practicing self-compassion - You can’t effectively show compassion for others if you are beating yourself up. Be kind and generous to yourself. I’ll let the Buddha have the bottom line on this one. Buddha said, “If your compassion doesn’t include yourself, it is incomplete.” Who’s going to argue with the Buddha?

The full blog post is here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/compassion-turbulent-times-sophie-oberstein