I had an epiphany on the beach.
It was at the end of a week-long family vacation. I was lying in the sun,
sipping a watermelon juice, and I noticed that I hadn’t had a thought about
work for the past week.
Up until that moment, this was exactly
what I was unhappy with about my job – that my work is insignificant, that this
is work I’ve been doing for a long time and is no longer the professional
challenge I relish, that my identity has been about advancing in my career and
that this job (and my last couple of jobs really, since I scaled back to focus
on parenting) is really a step back.
But as I gazed out at the
ocean, I thought that perhaps having a job that isn’t especially taxing, that
isn’t on a fast track anywhere, and that doesn’t matter in the great scheme of
things isn’t such a bad thing. After all, it allows me to go on vacations
with my family and be totally present. At home, it allows me to have time for
regular exercise, regular volunteer activity, and to take time off as needed to
support my family and friendships. While
my job isn’t what I dreamed it would be at this stage in my life, it is a good
job with a great boss and terrific benefits.
I decided in that moment that I
have nothing to complain about in this job, and I haven’t since. Mine is certainly
a privileged person’s revelation, but it’s also about changing nothing about
your situation other than your thoughts and having a totally different
experience. It’s also about being okay when an aspect of your life isn’t where
you want it to be when that allows you be fully satisfied in other aspects. And
it’s about letting go of parts of your identity when they no longer serve you.
Even if you’re not in as fortunate a conundrum as I was, I hope those lessons
can be beneficial in your circumstances.
* The title of this post is a quote attributed to writer
Harold R. McAlindon.
NOTE: For
those – like me - who count to make sure I don’t exceed my 200 word per post limit,
I apologize; I’m over by 139 words this time!
