An Attitude of Gratitude

In its first incarnation, I dedicated an issue of this newsletter to the topic that is most prevalent in my life - that really brings me the most joy - gratitude. I thought it an appropriate way to end 2011 to focus again on how thankful I am for all that I have been given, for all that I have worked for and achieved, and for all those around me whom I'm lucky enough to have in my life.

Long ago, Maya Angelou was talking with interviewer, David Holmstrom, about a period in her life when she was depressed. She talked about the advice she was given to lift herself from the funk she was in. She was told, "... here's a yellow pad. Write your blessings... Start with the fact that you can hear me, that you see the page, that you can hold the pen."

If we start with the blessings as basic - and significant - as Angelou was asked to think about, imagine how vast our gratitude can be. A recent article in the New York Times (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/22/science/a-serving-of-gratitude-brings-healthy-dividends.html?_r=1&scp=1&sq=attitude+of+gratitude&st=nyt) points to the benefits of an "attitude of gratitude" and suggests what will be this post's coaching exercises related to this topic.

There isn't a more grateful poet I can think of than Walt Whitman. His passion for all that he experienced is uplifting. Here is an excerpt from his "Song at Sunset."

To breathe the air, how delicious!
To speak - to walk - to seize something by the hand!
To be this incredible God I am!

O amazement of things, even the least particle!
O spirituality of things!
I too carol the sun, ushered or at noon, or as now, setting,
I too throb to the brain and beauty of the
earth and of all the growths of the earth.

I sing to the last the equalities, modern or old
I sing the endless finales of things.
I say nature continues - glory continues.
I praise with electric voice,
For I do not see one imperfection in the universe,
And I do not see one cause or result lamentable at last.


I hope that 2012 brings each of you much to be grateful for.
~ Sophie

Resisting the Crackberry

After a decade or so of refusing the Blackberries offered to me at various jobs, I’ve finally accepted one from my current employer. I think the evolution of my thinking about the Blackberry mirrors the evolution of my thoughts about technology in general.

I’m ready for a Blackberry because there are some functions that my simple flip phone just can’t do. For instance, I can’t check my e-mail one last time before I go in to the movie theater to see if I’ve heard back from someone I’m expecting to hear from. But that doesn’t mean I have to become a Crackberry addict. I get to choose what kind of relationship I want to have with my Blackberry, just like I have chosen to have a Facebook account for the past five years, but not to spend much time using it.

More broadly, I’ve gone from thinking of technology as an anti-social, isolating facet of life, to recognizing how much it can do to maintain and build relationships. My daughter uses it to keep in touch with friends from summer camp and from California. My son bonds with new friends over games that allow them to create new worlds and to post videos they make themselves (videos I don’t recommend you take a look at) to youtube. Of course, this newsletter itself is one of the ways I use technology to remain connected to others like you, my wonderful readers!

So, I have a new piece of technology in my life to manage now. I’ve completed a coaching exercise of my own to determine what that relationship will look like. Feel free to try the exercise (below) out for yourself. I look forward to communicating with many of you on my new device!

Take care,

~ Sophie

COACHING EXERCISE

Each year, my kids are asked by their schools to create and/or to sign a technology contract. This document starts with some general principles they want to remember related to the use of technology and then then includes specific rules they agree to observe. Here’s my own Blackberry contract. You can define your relationship – or your family’s relationship – with your technology by creating a similar document.

The Blackberry is not to interfere with my being present with the people in front of me.

I won't take the Blackberry in to meetings. If a face-to-face meeting is important enough to have, I intend to be fully present for it and with the people at the table with me.

Pre-existing rules about not answering phone calls (and now e-mails) during family dinners remain in force.

The Blackberry will not stop me from figuring things out on my own, or exploring new neighborhoods, restaurants, shops, etc., even when this means having an experience less ideal than I could have had had I looked it up on the Blackberry.

Having a Blackberry will not increase the number of games I play or the time I spend playing them.

The Blackberry can keep me better connected with my children.

I will keep it charged and carry it with me so that my children can reach me.

I will appreciate my kids’ help in learning to use the Blackberry, and I will remember I do not have to use it for everything I’m shown that it can do.

QUOTES I LIKE RIGHT NOW

“Computers are magnificent tools for the realization of our dreams, but no machine can replace the human spark of spirit, compassion, love, and understanding.” ~ Louis Gerstner, CEO, IBM

“Where is all the knowledge we lost with information?” ~ T.S. Elliot

“The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.” ~ B. F. Skinner

“Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.” ~ Andy Rooney

“One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.” ~ Elbert Hubbard